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Pokémon Red and Blue
Super Mario 3D Land
Dani Ahrens Founding Member
Hey! I’m Daniiii!! (They/Them)
Resident Evil Village
Part of me wants to take away a star just because I wish there was more of it. 😅

Jokes aside, this game is a blast. SO much quality horror. SO many times I approached a door, heard something, and just went NOPE. Plus, we get a “Fast and the Furious” style plot: it’s all about family.

I’d highly recommend playing the RE REmakes, and RE7, before jumping into this one. That said, if you do jump right into 8, you’re still going to have a blast.

Five stars, no question.
Dave the Diver
This game rules, but reader beware:

It’s crazy addictive. 😅

It’s calming.
An exquisite blend of beloved gaming genres.

I both want to finish it, and am worried I may need to go to rehab after. It’s eating up my life.
WarioWare: Move It!
I rate games based on one steadfast mentality:

“Does this game fully capitalize on its premise, while accomplishing what it set out to achieve?”

I love the entire Wario Ware franchise. Of them all, the TOP-TIER Wario Ware games almost feel like they’re trying to make the point,

“See THIS is why Nintendo made this console! Look at all these features developers never used! THESE are the mechanics that could’ve been in your games, ALL ALONG!!!”

They’re games that spit in the face of all other games, and say “You lack imagination. Here’s innovation with boogers.”

They’re games that defy emulators, laughing “Hahaha! How’re you going to blow into your PC, to make this balloon explode with farts!? Shouldn’t have sold that 3DS, huh?”

Hear me when I tell you, this is the ONLY Switch game that utilizes every feature the Switch has to offer.

You’ve never played a game like this on the Switch, and that’s a damn shame.

It’s been an insane year for games - way too many Game Of The Year contenders to count.

Still, if those GOTY lists focused solely on the Switch alone - I guarantee you this would flood the “top 3” of bloggers, everywhere.

Perfect for all ages. Cannot recommend this game, enough. Feel free to report back and tell me I’m right, after the 5th time you’re like “WAAAAHHHHH!?!?!? The Switch can do THAT!?!?”
Super Mario Bros. Wonder
So far, it’s been a 5 for me!

It’s easily the best Multiplayer Mario since “3D World” (on Switch) - which I know is a major selling point for anyone here with a partner or a kid!

The only things that might drop it down to a 4 for me:

1. The learning curve isn’t as forgiving as other Mario games. There are some levels that are WAY too difficult WAY too early - and I’m still sorting out whether that’s a pro or a con.
Luckily, the developers gave each level a star-based difficulty rating, and you don’t need to play the hard levels to progress.
Ultimately this might just be a clever way to encourage players to return to previously beaten zones, once they feel confident enough to face the more difficult levels.
So while it was frustrating for me starting the game, it may be something I value as I progress.

2. The “Hidden Treasure Hunt” levels are infuriating. I’ve only had one so far, and it made both me and my partner rage-quit and go to bed many times.

Now that the game is public, and player guides are being released, this likely won’t be an issue. Still, for no-guide gamers, this is going to be a major Petey-Pirhanna-sized thorn in their side. It’s easily my least favorite feature from any Mario game.

3. The badges are CRUCIAL to the game, and some of the “badge unlock” levels are GRUELING. SO FAR, this has only been an issue for my partner.
Still… as someone with a dexterity / tactile disorder, I can see this being a major frustration down the line; needing a badge to beat a zone, but not being able to unlock the badge.

Still - it’s a very VERY fun time, and has offered some weird, unique gameplay that previously was only present in Nintendo games via the Wario Ware franchise. That level of ingenuity alone earns it all the stars in the Mushroom Kingdom.

James Bond 007: Nightfire
Imagine a multiplayer shooter game where you can play as Spider-man with a rocket launcher.

That. Is. This. Game.

To this day, I don’t think any multiplayer experience has offered the same gameplay as Under Fire. When Spider-Man has a rocket launcher… there is a LOT of tension you go through, as the other player! So much suspense that’s also SO much fun!

Four stars ONLY because I can’t remember the plot or any of the solo play. 😅

This was THE game that my brother and I bonded over, before we found Time Splitters.

This game deserves so much love.
Super Mario Sunshine
In terms of 3D Mario, this game forever changed the entire franchise. With Mario 64, we got different environments that offered all new challenges for players.

From this game forward, every Mario has had a DISTINCT vibe and visual language. Remembering playing this as a kid… I can still hear the music. I can almost feel the sun on my face.

It’s maybe the first Nintendo game where the fun isn’t only in the levels: it genuinely feels fun to walk around the in-between space too! Honestly, I remember the areas between levels more than the levels themselves.

Plus, it fully explores the game’s gimmick and is stunningly gorgeous.

Five stars. One of the most memorable Mario games of all time.
The Jackbox Party Pack 2
One of the best party games ever made.
Top tier.

I play this series every year with my family over zoom for my birthday.

Very fun. Very funny!

I’d gladly watch any CH3 stream that features the Jackbox games, every week! No question!
WarioWare: Touched!
Pick. Da. NOSE.


TLC's "Dr. Pimple Popper" owes a life-debt to this game: a masterpiece that overtly shouted,

You'll pluck, you'll suck, you'll duck, you'll buck, you'll chuck, you'll shuck--

This game is THE MOST "WarioWare" any WarioWare game gets, solely because of how often it requires you to swiftly blow your spit and gusto into your DS mic, inviting all sorts of bacteria to breed within your DS.


While I'm not a popper/plucker myself, I've loved many of your kind and deeply respect your beautiful, twisted urge to purge your fellow humans of their skin sins.
This isn't a spoiler for the game, btw. Just truth.

The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
We need a Hyrule child to cross all oceans and any oceans...... solo .
SO solo.
SOLO to the point where the Hyrule child sincerely believes their wooden red dragon boat is talking to them; because they've been at sea, so long.

The child must drink salt water. Drink ocean. Drink OCEAN.
Then you'll win.

This game reminds you that "loading screens" disguised as "sailing semi-aimlessly for 45+ minutes" are a GOOD thing to spend your time on. It's the best thing to do.

I have so much love for this game - but the inevitable Switch remake better have improved teleportation spots! 😅
I lost about 50% of my puberty-years to memories of that boat going nowhere.

Soulcalibur IV
I'm giving this game 5-stars.

NOT because of the ingenuity in gameplay.
There's a lot of attention to character-size-and-shape when it comes to gameplay and timing; and that probably deserves a lot more attention than I'm educated to give.

Let's. Talk. Fashion.

It's hard to believe costume design wasn't a MAJOR focus of this game, because it seems like it is the only thing they focused on.

HOT DANG, I played this game SO much, just to see the characters. I lost SO MUCH, JUST to see the characters!

I'm adding context to my review, in the hopes you read it. This game is on par with most fighter games you'll find...

That said, in terms of the GameCube version, there's never been any other game where you can make Link fight against a gender-ambiguous, life-ambiguous mummy-person, who uses Yoga and hand-knives to slice and confuse their opponents.

That's a wild sentence for you to read.

It's a wild game to play.

Donkey Kong Jungle Beat
Every once in a while, Nintendo does a risky "one-time gimmick" kind of game. We've all accepted it - and that occasional bit of nerdy weirdness is part of why we love 'em.

That's the stuff that makes memories.

You may not remember most games you played on your PS2, but if you played this game - you REMEMBER it.

I still remember the feeling of those drums on my finger tips. I remember the weird restraint you need, cuz the game pushes you to slap slap SLAP those drums, but you also don't wanna break a controller cuz

I don't know what more you could possibly want from this game.

It's visually gorgeous, it perfectly executes what it set out to do - an experience you'll never forget.
During quarantine, I collected every card in this game - except for one, which is now my "White Whale."

This game is so intuitive, everyone from your baby to your grandmammy can play. On top of that, it's definitely the best game to pull out if you have company over - or hosting a party.

It taps into our innate, human instincts for beats, melody, and rhythm - and shows that everyone has the ability to make music, if given the right instrument.

This game kicks SO much ass, and I hope all of you give it a shot.

Plusssss, they stopped making them a few years back. SO if you're a collector, and you're looking to own a TRUE piece of gaming history, this is a purchase you're going to want to make. You'll own something that can't be emulated by any console, and will only get rarer with time.

Cannot recommend this game enough.
Bro Force
The only reason this isn't getting a full 5 is because they've promised multiple bro-spansion packs / DLC, and none of it has been added yet.

I don't think this game would ever work in 3D, which is part of why I love it. It takes everything you loved from action side-scrollers, and cranks it past 11, straight into 69.
This game will rock you till your ears bleed.

Outside that, this is one of THE BEST multiplayer experiences I've had. It really enforces the "No Bro Left Behind" mentality.

Cannot recommend enough. Hopefully we'll see more, soon.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom
When you go into a critique of anything, I believe it hinders a viewer’s enjoyment to limit their appreciation by what they feel, during consumption.
Some games are meant to frustrate you. Some movies are meant to make you feel bad.

I try to always base any review I make, whether it be movie or game, with one simple question:

“Does the piece successfully accomplish what it set out to do, in terms of its own thesis statement?”

Sure, I’d love if I could play as Wario in this game. It would be the perfect game.

TOTK gives you its thesis statement the moment you jump off that first sky island. From then on out, it’s constantly capitalizing on its well-crafted gameplay loop, and expands on the player’s expectations in every possible way.

This game perfectly accomplished what it set out to do. You’ll be in tears, about how massive this kingdom can be.


Metroid Prime
I know I’m wearing nostalgia-glasses right now, but this was maybe my favorite game of the GameCube era.

It was my introduction to Metroid. From the first zone to last, I was blown away by the depth of detail; the environment, the wildlife, the landscape. I was transported into this world.

As a bonus, it has two of the most memorable final boss battles I’ve ever played.